A few readers have been regularly sending in questions every time there was a new article in the Sex & Dating Section.
Their questions were focused on their specific stressors when it comes to Sex & Dating. Here are a few of many:
Q: I’ve been talking to this guy for about two months and when we first started talking, we agreed that it wouldn’t get too serious because neither of us was ready to be in a relationship, again. My feelings have really grown for him since then and I’m seriously starting to like him and he’s starting to like me too. What should I do?”
A: I think you guys should let nature run its course. Obviously, you both had preconceived notions about relationships and how unattractive a relationship sounds but you’re beginning to really connect and good connections are rare, so I think you should try it out to be quite honest. Avoid being overanalytical and definitely avoid romantic comedies that try and tell you how your relationship should happen.
Q: There is this girl in one of my classes that I always thought was really cute and funny so I had a crush on her. Then we got paired up to do group work so everything changed and she became like family to me. Then I began to go through some stuff and I felt like she wasn’t really there for me so I kind of distanced myself from her, but since then my feelings have come back! She doesn’t know this and now she wants to be my roomate next semester! What do I do?”
A: I think you shouldn’t even consider being her roomate. Being her roomate while you’re attracted to her would be too taxing on you. You would always have to remind yourself that it can’t go any further than where she wants the friendship to be. Being her roomate would not be fair to you especially since she doesn’t know you have feelings for her. Not a good idea.
Q: I’ve been texting this guy everyday for about a month now and I really like him. The problem is I don’t think he likes me the same way I like him. What should I do?”
A: Leave him alone. I really mean this with all my heart. If a guy really likes you, you will know by the way he introduces you to his friends, if that has never happened there’s a sign. You will know by the things he says to you, how you make him feel or how he feels about you, if you don’t know there’s are other signs. You will know because he will do things with you that he has always wanted to do or has never done with another female, if this has not occurred, there’s another indicator he doesn’t like you in that way. Everyone has been where you are. It’s nothing you did or said and there is nothing you can do or say to make him like you. Leave it alone before you get hurt.
Q: I’m in love with this guy and I’m not really sure if he loves me back… we’re really close friends and have been close to each other for over a year. I’ll do anything for him and he’ll do anything for me. But I’m scared to tell him I love him, what do I do?”
A: You guys have been friends for a while and if what you say is true, he obviously cares about you, he just might not love you the same way you love him. So before you do anything you should make sure you are strong enough and ready to handle any and all the outcomes of you telling him. Whether it is him saying he doesnt want to be your friend anymore, him feeling the same way or you never hearing from him again. Be ready for anything. Good luck.
Q: I’m with this guy and I really like him, but he just wants to have sex with me all the time. Is there a way I can change his mind?”
A: No. Remember you can’t change other people, only they have the power to make changes in their lives and outlooks.
Interested in asking J.R. some Sex & Dating questions?
Contact J.R. at: jr_yussuf@clemagazine.com
